Author: crimyla
Creating a family
From AfterEllen.com Caroline Madden is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who has worked with many lesbian couples, as well as adults who were adopted as children, a demographic who often share similar concerns to children conceived via sperm donation. Her strong recommendation to perspective lesbian parents was to use a willing-to-be-known donor from a sperm…
My Tips in Huff Post Article: Moving on After an Affair
As some of you know, I am the author of two books on infidelity: Fool Me Once: Should I Take Back My Cheating Husband? and After a Good Man Cheats: How to Rebuild Trust & Intimacy With Your Wife. I was recently quoted in the Huffington Post as an expert on affairs in marriage. Everything You Need To Know About…
Therapeutic Issues for Same-Sex Couples
Many same sex couples struggle with limited support, a sense of “minority stress,” pervasive societal negativity, and feelings of ostracism. Maintaining lasting love amid such adversity is daunting. Many same-sex couples are able to remain intact in such a hostile framework, a testament to their tenacity and sincerity. Gender Roles Do gender roles hold significance…
Lesbian Self Help Books
Sometimes people want to first try self-help versus going to see a counselor. I get that. These are recommendations of books that I have read, trust, and use daily as a therapist—and some as a wife 😉 For those going through a rough heartbreak I also have song recommendations. Dr. John Gottman is the…
Lack of Boundaries Creates Problems in Lesbian Relationships
Lesbians or other women in same-sex relationships tend to have the “urge to merge.” In this process the women equate sameness with being in love. After a period of time this can create resentment, and even anger. Often it leads to the dreaded “Lesbian Bed Death.”
Not just for straight couples
Sometimes, with the best of intentions, therapists do gay clients a disservice by treating them “like everybody else.” In doing so, they overlook the unique challenges lesbian and gays face. They might not be “homophobic” but are they “heterocentric”? Do they know the difference? Do you? I hear well-meaning therapists all the time say “couples…
Third Tip: Choosing a Therapist
3. Briefly tell the prospective therapist why you are seeking therapy at this time. Ask if they have previously treated clients presenting with your issues. You don’t want to be a therapist’s test case. You
Second Tip: Choosing a therapist #2
2. If you have particular cultural or religious beliefs, be open and upfront with the therapist about them in your initial phone conversation. You are going to someone for help, not to be judged. If
First Tip: Choosing a therapist #1
1. Pay attention to how you feel when speaking on the phone with the therapist. Do you feel comfortable? Does your gut reaction tell you that this is a therapist that you will feel comfortable